Monday, March 19, 2007

Poll: Do You Believe Attorney General Gonzales?

By William Prendergast

After searching the web all night for free web polling services and giving my email address out to total strangers to try out a string of “free web polling services,” I have concluded that none of them are suitable for our purposes here.

As regular readers know, we have been having problems with our usual polling service. For some reason the service provider is unable to present our poll questions as written—this state-of-the-art high tech company regularly substitutes a little box for a quotation mark or an apostrophe.

None of the other services can handle the job either; I tried several last night and they can’t handle a poll question that is much longer than “What is your favorite color.” As our readers know, we handle much more complicated issues than that here on the Stillwater Tribune. (But if you want to tell everyone what your favorite color is, that’s okay, just send it in to the comment thread following this post.)

Nonetheless, we are determined to continue polling here at the Stillwater Tribune. From now on we will not use *any* free online web hosting service; instead we will just print the poll question as if it were a regular item for discussion. We will include, as usual, a list of multiple choice answers. Each answer will have a letter in front of it—A,B, C or D.
You can click on the letter of your choice with your mouse and pretend that your answer is being recorded as polling data.

In fact it will not be. Nothing will happen as a result of you clicking on a letter to record your opinion. But you will know that, and that will give you an advantage over future readers who arrive here and attempt to answer future poll questions. They will not know that their opinion is not being recorded or taken into account in the polling results (which I will make up)--and you and I can enjoy a good laugh at the expense of these new readers. And we all need a good laugh, these days.

This Week’s Poll: Do you believe Gonzales?

Critics claim that Attorney General Gonzales fired eight US attorneys because they refused to cooperate with GOP efforts to use their offices to harass Democratic candidates and limit voter turnout. Gonzales claims that the firings were not politically motivated and that all these attorneys were all dismissed for poor performance.
Do you believe Attorney General Gonzales?

Click on one of the following answers.

A. How can Gonzales claim that the “late 2006/early 2007” firings of these attorneys were “performance related” if White House emails show that Karl Rove and Harriet Miers were trying to get them all fired as far back as January, 2005?

B. I believe Attorney General Gonzales--because he’s sent so many people to the death chamber, and that’s one list I don’t want to be on, believe you me, bucko!

C. I believe Attorney General Gonzales. I also believe I’ve been picked up and anally probed by space aliens.

D. I didn’t believe the last few stories that Attorney General Gonzales told about why the attorneys were fired, but I am trying to keep an open mind about whatever story he comes up with next week.

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