Theater: How Does An Artist Cope With A Crisis?
Well, there was a lot of good juicy stuff coming out of Washington that would have made great material for the blog. But I'm too busy; all that will have to wait til next Monday.
Because my new play is going to open tomorrow night in New Orleans and the director comes up to me tonight and tells me that the air conditioning in the theater has broken. In sweltering New Orleans. Hmm, what would Shakespeare have done?
I don't know, but what I ended up doing (as others scrambled to fix the air conditioning)was write a whole new bunch of "my dick is so big" jokes that I am now going to pass along to you, the readers of this blog, at no extra charge. It calms me down.
-My dick is so big that it has valet parking.
-My dick is so big it had to be continued on the next dick.
-My dick is so big that if I whip it out this whole room will turn pink.
-My dick is so big that no one will care if the air conditioning in the theater isn't working.
-My dick is so big that it sleeps in the bedroom and I have to sleep out on the couch.
-My dick is so big that it's represented in Congress.
-My dick is so big it has a "no smoking" section.
-My dick is so big that when I get a hard-on it rises in the east and sets in the west.
-My dick is so big that I have to fly Economy AND First Class.
-My dick is so big that it has to manufacture its own license plates.
-My dick is so big I get to park in the handicapped space.
-My dick is so big that I met it coming the other way down the street yesterday.
-My dick is so big, my urologist has to ride a motorcycle.
-My dick is so big that it's not taking my phone calls anymore.
-My dick is so big... (and here you make a physical gesture by spreadind your arms, indicating that your dick is "so big." (This is a pun on the phrase "so big."))