Bush to Dems: Come on, guys, cut it out, that hurts, OW, cut it out...

The White House is outraged by all these time-wasting investigations of the Justice Department and illegal wire-tapping and the Fourth Branch of government theory and stuff. "Why all the negative energy, man?" Look:

White House raps recent flurry of probes


By DEB RIECHMANN, Associated Press Writer Thu Jul 5, 5:28 PM ET

WASHINGTON - The White House on Thursday pushed back against congressional investigations of the Bush administration and said lawmakers should spend more time passing bills to solve domestic problems.

(I wish Bush had focused more on passing bills to solve domestic problems over the past seven years—instead of campaigning for Republican candidates and screwing up other countries. Wait a minute—no, I don’t wish he’d spent more time on domestic problems. I take that back. Anyway:)

In a constitutional showdown with Congress, the administration claimed executive privilege and rejected demands for White House documents about the firings of eight U.S. attorneys.

(Isn’t *that* a “domestic problem?* Trying to use the Justice Department to criminalize your political opposition and disenfranchise voters? I know it’s near the top of my list...)

The House and Senate Judiciary committees have set a deadline of 10 a.m. next Monday for the White House to explain its basis for the claim.

The administration has not said when or if it will respond.

(“We’re not *saying* how we’ll respond, how do you like them apples, smarty pants?” Oh, that's mature.)

Spokesman Scott Stanzel said Thursday the White House has received a many requests for information since Democrats took control of Congress in January and has turned over 200,000 pages of documents.

(Except for the documents that Congress wants.)

"They've launched over 300 investigations, had over 350 requests for documents and interviews and they have had over 600 oversight hearings in just about 100 days," Stanzel said.

(Well, that’s hardly their fault. Why don’t you just give ‘em what they’re asking for, then we could wrap this whole thing up and you guys could go home. Or, to prison...)

..."His numbers are as faulty as the intelligence they used to make their case for war," said Jim Manley, a spokesman for Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev.

(Ouch! A little snark there, from the old man.)

Subpoenas have been delivered to the offices of Bush, Cheney, the national security adviser and the Justice Department about the administration's warrantless wiretapping program.

(Free ride’s over, Bush boys. This is Washington, you don’t go around begging for mercy and respect for the office after the way Republicans treated the Clintons. Your guys spent more than seven years investigating Whitewater—a decades old banking scandal that turned out to be no scandal at all. The Dems have only spent a hundred days investigating crap that going on right now at the White House. This president's gonna get all the "deference and fair play" that the Republican Congress showed to Bill Clinton during the Lewinsky scandal, because this "police state" stuff's a a hell of a lot more important.)

In a letter to Congress last week, White House counsel Fred Fielding said the administration had rejected subpoenas for documents through the claim of executive privilege. That letter also made it clear that neither former presidential counsel Harriet Miers nor former White House political director Sara Taylor would testify on Capitol Hill next week, as directed by the subpoenas.

(“We refuse to testify on the grounds that it may—What we mean is, nobody’s talkin’, see? Dat’s why we sprung Scooter, see? If we let him go into da stir, dey’d all be singin’ like canary-boids, see? So nobody’s talkin’, see? M’yeah...)

That’s my “Little Caesar” imitation, for all you youngsters out there. He’s the new counsel to the Justice Department, see? M’yeah...